Monday Mess: Audience Feedback. Right.

I'm exploring a new genre with my new WIP. It's a genre I love to read. It's a genre my sons love to read. It's YOUNG ADULT FANTASY.
Now, I know that can mean a lot of things, but mine is Medieval Fantasy, in a parallel universe. There is magic. There are no magical creatures. Yet. I reluctantly asked the kids (who were trapped with me in the car this weekend as we drove to Grandma's house for Easter dinner), "Will I need to add a magical creature?"
The 12 year old, who was clear in the back, piped up, "YES!" followed instantly by the 18 and 15 year old who commanded, "NO."

Right.

I can't believe the self-doubt that is accompanying me on this one. I am really enjoying writing this and developing the characters and conflict. I LOVED creating the magic. The 15 year old helped me work out the war and politics end of things, and together we created a map of the countries, rivers, lakes, mountains. He wants to make a calendar. I have 61 pages and I plan on taking 15 of those to Boot Camp and the Storymakers Writers Conference in a couple weeks. I have no idea which 15 pages.

Because a member of my target audience (15-18?), my 15 year old son, is reading my story . . . and his feedback has been critical and helpful . . . he thinks I'm too wordy and yes, the female lead's character is a little baffling to him . . . but it's good and it needs something and . . . and . . . and I HAVE NO IDEA IF I'M DOING THIS RIGHT. Blah. Am I any good at this? Not just any good, but am I SIGNIFICANTLY good at this? Isn't that what a writer has to ask every now and then?

But I really am having fun writing it. I can't wait to get back to it. That counts for something, right?

Right?

Monday Mess: Getting Lost Should Be a Choice

It's Spring Break here in Cody, Wyoming, and the family and I are tackling some projects around the house. But right now, I'm the only one awake. The pup woke me up to take him out and then, as always, my mind began to wander through my current writing project, preventing me from falling back asleep. So here I am in my living room in my robe, contemplating maps.

I just spent two weekends in Salt Lake City. Two weeks ago I went down with my son. We've been there before, and I didn't think to print out any maps. I don't have a smart phone and I don't have GPS. I'm old-fashioned that way. I got lost half-a-dozen times too many. We were laughing a lot. And made a lot of phone calls for help. I do have a cell phone. I'm not THAT archaic.

This last weekend, I printed out maps, highlighted the routes, wrote down addresses, and figured out the intimidating interstate exchange I needed to know. SO. MUCH. BETTER. I didn't get lost once. Of course, it helped that my friend who lives there drove some of the time. But when I was out on my own, I didn't get lost once. Maps. Duh.

I need two kinds of maps for the story I'm working on now. First, I need a story map. I have no idea if there's an official name for what I have in mind. Storyboard? Spiderweb outline? I don't know, but I need a big piece of paper, a pencil, colored markers, and some space. I'm thinking the coffee table in front of the couch. I'll have to move the tray of candles, magazines, and my daughter's carnations she received after her performance in The Wizard of Oz. I have some butcher paper from the first (and last) time my husband and his dad "dressed" an antelope in my kitchen. *shudder* There are a plethora of markers in the house, though it may take a few minutes to weed out the dried up ones.

Then I'm just going to have fun and write down characters, connections, place names, directions, histories, conflicts, key magic words . . . map it out and make a beautiful mess. I'm excited to have it in one place I can put up on a wall and go to for reference, add to if needed. I usually keep all this info in a spiral notebook, but with my current project, I want to see it all together. Sure, I'll still have notebook pages of info: language, calendar, character outlines, blurbs of scenes and conversation that come to me too early, to be used later. But I'm excited about this story map.

The other kind of map is an actual geographical map. I've reached a point in the story where I really need to keep track of places and direction. I'll try not to be too messy with this one.

With my maps, I have no intention of getting lost. But that doesn't mean I won't explore a little. If an idea draws my attention, I'll see how it may or may not fit into the story, and I'll be able to see how to get back on track.

I found this as part of Nokia's "Let's never get lost again." campaign. It's true.

Maps. Duh.

Monday Mess: Who Put A Sonnet In My WIP?

So I'm working on this new project that has invaded my brain space and I'm writing along, minding my character's business, and BLAM, she needs a sonnet.

A. SONNET.

I know, right?
But I don't question The Muse.

So I Google "how to write a sonnet" and I get Sonnet Writing For Dummies or something like that. Click here if you'd like to see for yourself. If not, these are the bones of the idea:

• It must consist of 14 lines.

• It must be written in iambic pentameter (duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH). Every line.

• It must be written in one of various standard rhyme schemes, like the following Shakespearean scheme:

A
B
A
B
C
D
C
D
E
F
E
F
      G
      G

Every A rhymes with every A, every B rhymes with every B, and so forth. This one is made up of three quatrains (four consecutive lines of verse that make up a stanza) and one couplet (two consecutive rhyming lines of verse). Shakespeare was famous for his rhyming couplets. Like I have to tell you.

But that's not all, NOOOO that's not all. The sonnet has to be built up. The main idea is presented, often as a metaphor, pondered, and then built into an argument. Complications, twists, conflicts are thrown in, tearing down the initial idea. And then, the rhyming couplet comes to the rescue. These last two lines are meant to swoop in and save the day, like a ray of hope. They might introduce a new line of thinking, or prove the complications as nothing to despair over. Yay.

My answer to the question, "If you could have any superpower, what would it be?" has always been Tirelessness. Not as in cars, but as in having boundless energy. It's a bird, it's a plane, no! It's Indefatigable!

I'd also wear jammies like this. Because even though I'd never have to sleep, I still like to wear jammies.

But if I were to have a second choice, I think I would be Rhyming Couplet. Coming in at the point of hopelessness and proving the villain wrong. Yup.

In your face, Misery and Woe.

But I digress. Would you like to read my sonnet? I'm not going to say much about it, except it's the protagonist's favorite, and she doesn't know why, exactly. But she will. *smiles mysteriously*

Ahem. I give you Sonnet 11, and a little more, from Silkener, by Krista Lynne Jensen.

What hath removed itself will come again.

‘Tis promised in the arms of Heaven’s clocks.

Tho in the throes of dust you may have been,

Yet counted ‘midst the sweet beloved flocks.

What love is this to crumble fixed stone?

And satisfy love’s yearning for return?

Nay, you cannot see its flesh and bone,

Nor feel love’s truth and light within you burn.

For man is hopeless, cruel as he is blind,

And taken in by power, greed, and lust.

A selfish beast can lure with truths unkind,

Will offer falsehoods, honeyed in their crust.

      And yet would love’s true light taste sweeter still

      Through dust and blood, returned by Hope’s pure will!

This particular sonnet always left Jessamyn a bit dizzy. She had no idea who it was by, as it was accredited to “Love’s Last Hope”, which she found a touch melodramatic. She pictured some romantically tortured monk sitting in his dimly lit cell, furiously writing of his forsaken lover.

TA DA!
I have to admit, it was kind of fun to write.

Why not try writing a sonnet of your own? Sonnets For Dummies suggests writing a sonnet does all the following:

• Shows you how much you can pack into a short form.

• Gives you practice with rhyme, meter, structure, metaphor, and argument.

• Connects you with one of the oldest traditions in English poetry — one still vital today.

Have you ever written a sonnet? Do you have a favorite?

Monday Mess: Fake It 'Til You Make It?

I've had the flu the last few days and because we were on vacation, I've been running on cold meds, cough drops, and adrenaline. I simply wanted to enjoy my vacation, do everything we had planned, and didn't want to bring others down or hold them back. Through watery eyes and silenced sneezes, I faked my way through. And I had an awesome time.

Now, I'm home. I've been out of bed three times. Once to see the kids off to school. Once to feed myself and let the dog out. And once to . . . Okay, just two times. My husband came home during his workday to pick up something he forgot.
"Um, are you not feeling well?"
I stared at him. Then flung my arms out. He read this gesture correctly.
"Well, I know you weren't feeling well, but I thought you were getting better."
"How?" I asked, sounding in my head like I was speaking into a tin cup.
"Because yesterday you seemed pretty good."
"You mean yesterday when I slept from Mesquite to Provo, then sulked because I felt like breakfast and it was 1:30 and you guys picked Wendy's so I pretended my salad was french toast and said at least my sandwich had bacon in it?"
"Yeah."
"I was medicated and read the rest of the time. How is that feeling better?"
"I don't know. You looked better."
"That's because I washed my face."
He looked me over. "And combed your hair."

*blink*

Back to writing. I've recently posted about using real life and events to inspire characters, setting, and scenes. Well, this post is about hitting those points where you need to research. You can't always write what you know. Sometimes I come to a research point where I have to stop and look it up. A name, a map, a fact. And sometimes I do stop for the little things. But if it's bigger, like the layout of a famous amusement park, or what it takes to become a volunteer at a women's shelter, or the correct police procedure in child abandonment and missing persons, I mark the place with an asterisk, and fake it. I make my best guesses, stage what I see in my head, keep moving the story forward as far as I can, keeping in mind that I'll make the correct changes once I get the correct information. Then, when I can research, it's generally pretty easy to fit in the correct findings and, if needed, tweak the story a bit to fit.

BUT: If it's something that is weight-bearing for the plot, I stop where I am and research. No point trying to go forward, guess wrong, and have the ideas that follow end up worthless. You can bet that if I was burning up with fever, was unable to eat anything, and kept seeing Elvis in the room (although we were in Vegas, so more possibility there) I would have stayed in the hotel room, perhaps gone to the emergency room, and the vacation would have been put on hold a bit while I got the help I needed.

Are you following me? I guess what I'm trying to express is that knowing when you can fake it and just keep writing is important to the flow of your story. Just be sure to straighten things out later. Researching your facts, the things you don't know, is vital to your story's credibility. Even if it's fantasy, truth resonates. Magic or realms must be viable. And if a major part of your story is based on something unfamiliar, research as much as you can. I've read books where it's glaringly evident the author has never been to Australia, and other books where I would swear the author lived there for some time, only to learn they hadn't. They just researched everything they could find, talked to people, read.

When you're faking it? Keep in mind that readers know. So fake it good. Good enough that they're surprised you're still sick. Or whatever.

I need a nap. And a comb, apparently.

Monday Mess Yes I know It's Tuesday: Drawing Events from Real Life

Two weeks ago I posted about drawing characters from real life. This week I'd like to talk about using settings and events from real life.

One of the best pieces of advice I read when I first began writing seriously was this:
Think visually- Write cinematically. You know your scene. Can you direct it as if it were a movie? Bring in the atmosphere, tension, sound, scent, timing, dialogue. Move it.

I know numerous authors who have drawn on personal events (big or small) for their stories, whether they are contemporary, historical, sci-fi, fantasy, or romance writers. Why?
My answer is this: What better way to write something that sounds, feels, tastes, smells, and seems real, than writing something akin to what we have lived ourselves?

For example, in my novel, The Orchard, I had the basic story and characters first. I spent hours pondering the setting. I didn't know where to put them. I fell asleep one night mulling over some possibilities, and woke the next morning knowing exactly where they were, somewhere I hadn't considered, but knew they couldn't possibly be anywhere else. The movie in my head fell into place like watching a film of a puzzle exploding apart on rewind. It. Was. Awesome.

The location? A small lake town in Montana, where we had spent a week vacation the previous summer. We had camped there, experienced several different weather changes, explored the area every day, hiking, touring, shopping, eating, kayaking, swimming, stopping at fruit stands, cramming as much as we could into a week with my family. And it was perfect. In writing events in the novel, I remembered the sense of being there, and included some of the things we actually did and saw. From a simple extra like the Brahma bull sitting lazily in a pasture as a small herd of deer bounded silently behind it, kicking in what looked like mockery over the fence, to a major event, like the hike along Swan River and stopping at a crescent-shaped beach to rest. That small beach is referred to in the next two books! It also helped that I grew up next to an orchard, and my husband spent several summers working in them. Bonus.

In writing Grace & Chocolate, some of the protagonists memories of being a child of an alcoholic were drawn from my mother's. Maybe because of my relationship with my mom, I was able to put myself there and translate that emotion onto the page, but when she read it, though difficult, she was amazed by how I'd captured it. My happy childhood was a far cry from hers. Sympathy is huge. The setting? A town on the Oregon coast where I've spent many weeks in different seasons (for the record, my mom grew up in Buffalo, NY).

In The Lake, the protagonist is a ballet dancer. I am not. But my youngest daughter took dance in a small, intense dance studio for four years. In that time I observed the older girls, knew of their hard work and dedication, and worries, injuries, and frustrations. I asked questions and researched, and knew that every decision my protag made, whether about dance or not, would be affected by her dance world. It's that much of their life.

In my current WIP, the protag has escaped an abusive relationship and is trying to recover by hiding away on an island. It's a story I've wanted to write for years and wasn't sure how to go about it. Not because I don't know the situation, that I'm unfamiliar with that kind of abuse. Unfortunately, I am. It's why I'm compelled to write it. Because there's hope there. But, I hesitated because I didn't want people to think I was writing me, or an old boyfriend. Rather, I am writing the feelings, the confusion, the pain, the fight THAT I KNOW, and applying it to a new story. It's complicated, but it's an amazing feeling, translating something difficult, that makes me who I am, and giving it in story to a group of characters who will do what they can with it.

I guess what I'm trying to show here is that when a writer draws on what is real, forming it to the fantasy in his head, he has an opportunity to expand that created world, to invite the reader to relate through senses and memories. David Farland (Runelords, Ravenspell) refers to it as RESONANCE. When captured, it can do amazing things to a story. That's the hope, anyway.

Thoughts?

Monday Mess: Drawing Characters from Real Life

My friend Don inspired this post today, so you might want to go read about his plight over at Donald J.Carey. It's brief and a little funny, but it is something I've wondered about in imagining the upcoming release of my first novel, The Orchard. How many friends or relatives will think I've written them into a book?

I'm sure many writers will agree that characters sort of come to life on their own. Sure, we can give them a career, tell them what school they went to and how many brothers and sisters they have, but while writing them, or sometimes, scribing for them, their unique personalities develop as the hero, the love interest, the villain, the best friend, the counselor.

It usually isn't until after I've written characters interacting a good deal, that I go back and write character journals of each one. Then it's fun to enhance those interactions with some of the things I've discovered about each one. It's like getting to know somebody. You can be acquainted, know a little background, and listen to what they have to say. But then after spending some time with that person, you can attach more meaning to their words, and understand their actions and views better. Or in an author's case, you can write them better, deeper.

However, having said this, of course writers draw from influences around them. I'll share a few easy examples where my characters have been influenced by real people in my life:

In The Orchard, the hero, Derick, has an older sister. A lot of my mom went into her character, her energy, her desire to make sure everyone is comfortable. Even some of her coloring is influenced by my mom. My mom is thrilled. Especially since the character is younger.

In the same book, Ben's character is a combination of my dad (sweet and quiet) and my sister's old boyfriend (mannerisms). I didn't choose it that way, I just recognized the influences of those people in my life as I pictured Ben stepping out onto the front porch the first time and meeting the visitors to his ranch. Often, when I recognize attributes in my characters as those of people I know, it's a relief to be able to picture them as I write. I'm a visual writer and picture the story unfolding as a movie, and I'm just writing down what I see and hear. So it's wonderful to have a clear image of my characters.

In The Inn, the hero's son, Sam, is a combination of my two sons (but not in looks), and his youngest daughter, Lily, is my youngest, all the way. His oldest daughter, Chloe, talks as my oldest daughter would. Probably because my kids are such a presence in my hour-to-hour life that I couldn't escape their influence if I tried. In The Lake, Chloe's best friend was very much influenced by what I thought my 10 year old niece might be like in college.

But, and this is a big BUT (go ahead, giggle), though these characters have been influenced in some way by real people, their stories, their choices, their parts in the plot ARE NOT REAL. They play roles in bringing a story to life. So although Derick's sister resembles my mom, my mom is not married to a farmer-turned college professor, nor was she unable to have children. Ben is quiet and shy like my dad, but runs a ranch. My dad is a computer engineer, and doesn't care for horseback riding.

The protagonist in Grace & Chocolate is called Jill, after my cousin. But Jill my cousin is nothing like Jill in the book. At all. Actually, I've used a lot of my cousins' names in my books. But only because I love the names, and they were great for the characters. Assuming that I must be writing about my cousins would be like assuming I'm naming a baby after someone because I expect the baby to be just like that person.

So while poor Don is fielding questions about his characters, I will continue to write my new novel, which is set on Camano Island in the Puget Sound of Washington state, where the main character goes to stay with her 2 aunts, and I will continue to wonder what people will think, who know that I actually have 2 aunts who live together . . . on Camano Island.

And just for fun, I'll post some pictures I've found of some of my characters. It's so great to happen upon a face that makes you cry out, 'It's _____!" It's also a little insane. Oh well. Such is the life of a novelist.

Young Derick Whitney- THE ORCHARD

Young Alisen Embry-THE ORCHARD

Scott Gentry-GRACE & CHOCOLATE

Jillian Parish-GRACE & CHOCOLATE

Justin Michaels-THE LAKE

Chloe Brennan-THE INN, THE LAKE

*Just a note: I usually find a picture well after a character is established. It's not always spot on to what I see in my head, but it can come surprisingly close!

Next Monday Mess: Drawing Events from Real Life

Monday Mess: Likable Characters

So, if you've been here recently, you know I'm working on revising a very long novel entitled REMNANT. One piece of feedback I received was about a secondary character called Lahonti. Though Lahonti is secondary, he plays a pivotal part and even enjoys a few POV scenes. The problem? He was deemed unlikable. UNLIKABLE. From beginning to end, so much so that my reader skimmed over his parts towards the end of the book. Wow. That's a problem, considering Lahonti undergoes a character arc and helps bring about a significant change in the hero.
I ran this by my writer's group, one who has read the story, and one who hasn't. This is important. Talking through a problem with people who have or have not read your book can be so helpful. Fresh perspective is GOOD. As I expressed my concern about making this character less unlikable without changing who he is, an interesting question came up.
Carla asked, "Are you in Lahonti's head?"
I thought about that before I answered. I thought back to his backstory. I began talking, and this is basically what I said:

Lahonti has the heart of a soldier. War is all he's known since the age of fifteen. He witnessed his mother's and brothers' murders, and lost a sister as well. He is obedient to authority, his father's (a good man) particularly, and is extremely loyal. He has hardened himself against emotion, even the prospect of love, as a protection against loss. He is awkward in expressing generosity, kindness, and hope. He would do anything to protect those closest to him. He doesn't know what to do with who he is after war is behind him. He doesn't know how to proceed or what to hope for. He doesn't know what to do with the feelings he has for the heroine. He comes across as stubborn, hard-hearted, and cocky. As his world changes, he is floundering in all he believes in. But he wants to do what is right. He stumbles when it comes to knowing what right is.

Yeah, my writer friends agreed, I'm in his head.
But only a small portion of these glimpses are in the story. In order to make Lahonti likable, I need to up his reader's sympathy level. I need the reader to understand his turmoil, and wish him well, so they keep reading him. But I can't make him a sentimental softy. It wouldn't work with where he's been. And I can't just info dump (just cut and paste the above and stick it somewhere in the first chapter, right?). The challenge is to bring out Lahonti's hidden psyche a little at a time, but early enough on that the reader develops sympathy for him, so as he goes through his character arc, or growth, he is cheered on. So when Lahonti makes a mistake or says the wrong thing or loses his temper, the reader doesn't roll his eyes and skip the page, but cringes and says, "Aw, c'mon, Lahonti, I hear you, but you're better than this! Keep trying!" I need to make the reader care.

Here is a simple example of how I'm trying to go about this. We all love the before and after shot, right? The first chapter opens at the end of a battle. The toll has been great and Limhi (Lahonti's father) switches from warrior to physician. The enemy has not quite withdrawn, and they have a friend wounded on the battlefield.

Before:

Lahonti surveyed the grizzly scene and Limhi followed his gaze. Three days of fighting in this area alone. The first killed were beginning to rot beneath their brothers who fell after them.

“I would not name it a victory.” Lahonti was somber. Always somber.

Limhi looked around suddenly. “Where is Kir?”

“Safe. In a tree.”

“Of course. A bat.”

“A lethal bat.”

Limhi raised his eyebrows but said nothing.

Another moan. “Lim…”

“It is Aram.” Limhi narrowed his eyes to locate him.

“Aram? He is not laughing, now.”

Limhi shot his son a look. He shook his head in disapproval, but Lahonti was unrepentant.

“He delights in this, Father. You know that.”

After:

Lahonti surveyed the grizzly scene and Limhi followed his gaze. Three days of fighting in this area alone. The first killed were beginning to rot beneath their brothers who fell after them.

“I would not name it a victory.” Lahonti was somber. Always somber.

Limhi looked around suddenly. “Where is Kir?”

“Safe. In a tree.”

“Of course. A bat.”

“A lethal bat.”

Limhi raised his eyebrows but said nothing.

Another moan. “Lim…”

“It is Aram.” Limhi narrowed his eyes to locate him.

“Aram? He is not laughing, now.”

Limhi shot his son a look. He shook his head in disapproval and Lahonti dropped his head.

“I'm sorry. But he delights in this, Father. You know that.”

Did you feel the difference? *Please say yes* I think it's going to take little tweaks like this and barely noticeable peeks into Lahonti's psyche to make the difference between unlikable and likable. Or at least relate-able. It matters, even for secondary characters.

Any advice or thoughts?

Monday Mess: Cutting Board

I've begun working on my writing goals for the year and have 9,144 words in my new wip. I think I may reach my goal of 50,000 by the end of April! My other goal has been waiting patiently. I wanted to get a solid start into the new project before I took on side work. But it's time to begin. Which leads me to this morning's (and this blog's first) Monday Mess.

My challenge is to take a 184,095 word speculative historical adventure romance (I should probably narrow that down, too) and peel away about 70,000 words so it's heart can be heard loud and clear. I've done this before, but not to this scale. I chopped 60 pages from The Orchard before it was officially accepted. That's about 15,000 words (I'm going with 250 words per page, which seems to be my average).

For Remnant, I'll have to find a way to chop 280 pages. *gulp* Oh, my poor little darlings.

I am going to go with what worked for me last time. I'm printing out an editing draft of Remnant (1.5 spaced, no page breaks, 2-sided, ink saver mode hard copy), punching holes, and slipping it into a 3-ring binder. I have red pens and a highlighter. I have my reader's notes (thanks, Rob). I will also print out this:

REVEAL THE HEARTBEAT.

That will go on the bulletin board over my desk.


Scalpel?